WHY EMBRACING DISCOMFORT IS THE SECRET TO BECOMING A SUPERIOR DAD
WHY EMBRACING DISCOMFORT IS THE SECRET TO BECOMING A SUPERIOR DAD
Living at my edge and embracing discomfort has been a recurring theme for the past year. I've learned that staying in your comfort zone only leads to stagnation and a lack of growth. It wasn't always easy for me to accept this mindset, however. I spent most of my adult life being defensive and unwilling to take feedback on board.
But one experience that completely changed my outlook on life was when I did a four-day vision quest in the bush. All I had with me was a tarp and some water. It was the most uncomfortable and challenging experience I've ever had. But leaning into the discomfort of it allowed me to recognise that we are capable of far more than we imagine. The lesson was that we have nothing to fear but fear itself.
This experience taught me that I needed to stop being soft and embrace discomfort to grow and live to my fullest potential. The truth is that there are not enough real men in the world anymore, and men who know how to be savages but can control it and who don't shy away from challenges and discomfort.
In my opinion, too many men are pushovers or physically weak. It's concerning to see the decline of authentic masculinity in our society. Men should be mentally and physically strong and able to face challenges head-on.
One of the ways I've learned to embrace discomfort is by having uncomfortable conversations. Whether with friends, family, or colleagues, these conversations can be difficult but are necessary for personal growth and development. Being able to lean into discomfort and have these conversations is a sign of true strength.
Another way I've been able to embrace discomfort is through my men's group. Being a part of a community of like-minded men striving for growth has been incredibly beneficial. It's a space where we can be vulnerable and have those uncomfortable conversations in a supportive and safe environment.
Dealing with past traumas has also been a challenge for me. But I've found breath-work therapy with Zoran from Breathworks beneficial. It's not easy, and I don't look forward to the breaths, but I do them anyway because I know the benefits are worth it. This therapy has allowed me to confront and heal past traumas that I may have otherwise avoided.
In his book New Manhood, Steve Biddulph discusses the concept of "manbabies." These adult men still act like children and avoid responsibility and discomfort. It's a sad reality, but I've seen it play out in my own life and the lives of others around me. Men cannot remake themselves without suffering, and avoiding hard things and pain leads to stagnation and a lack of growth.
I've been trying to move into more discomfort, whether through physical challenges or uncomfortable conversations. It's not easy, but growing and living to my fullest potential is necessary. Embracing the discomfort and leaning into the edge separates the men from the boys. It allows us to live with purpose and meaning and be the best versions of ourselves.
Living at my edge and embracing discomfort has significantly influenced my growth and development. It's allowed me to confront my past traumas, have uncomfortable conversations, and become better, stronger, and more resilient. More men need to embrace discomfort and stop being soft. We need to be mentally and physically strong and face challenges head-on. Remember, men cannot remake themselves without suffering, so don't avoid hard things and pain. Instead, lean into the discomfort and embrace the edge.